In our most recent article, we reported the results of a question we recently posed to the members of Journey Pastoral Coaching.  The question was straightforward:  

“What is the greatest MINISTRY lesson you’ve learned since leaving your theological / ministry training school?”

We invite you to read the results of that survey by clicking here.

In this article we continue the theme, asking a very natural follow-up question: 

“Since entering your vocational service what is THE most meaningful CHANGE you have made in your life, the one that has most profoundly affected your ministry?” 

No subjects, categories, or guidelines were suggested; neither were there any limits on their responses. Respondents could offer any answer in any way they wished to do so.  It was only after reading their responses that we then grouped them by subjects. 

We present the results of this survey in two forms: 

First, by CATEGORY:  Which subjects were mentioned MOST OFTEN by respondents?  

The Top Three: 

1.  Reading (9% of all responses) 

2.  Spiritual Discipline: Word and Prayer (7% of all responses)

3.  Coaching, Grace, Peer Mentors, Relationships, Spiritual Discipline: Sabbath (Tie – each was referenced in 6% of all responses) 

Second, by INDIVIDUAL RESPONSES:  each respondent’s answer listed by category:

BALANCE

I started being intentional about finding a balance between ministry life and personal life. 

BEING

Recognizing that my value as a minister is not tied to what I accomplish. 

To be genuine, do from being.  

Learning not to try and be someone I’m not in ministry.   

I stopped using numbers as the main sign of health and success.  

BI-VOCATION

I decided to embrace being bi-vocational and settled into the life-style.  

CALLING

I decided to not let a position validate my calling. 

COACHING

I got a pastoral coach to walk with me.   

I added a pastoral coach to my life. It has helped me prioritize who I am in Jesus and keep me focused on what is important.  

I started looking for mentors in my life, i.e. personal counseling, coaching, and started mentoring others.

I began a coaching relationship.

I added a pastoral coach to my life and ministry. This was something I didn’t even know existed while in college and the couple years after graduating.  

CONFIDENCE

I started choosing to believe that if I ask God to use me He will.  

I chose to be bolder and speak up for myself.  I forced myself to not be afraid to be myself, step out, and not be defined by what others think of me. 

DISCIPLING

Focusing on discipling students who wanted to be chased rather than chasing students that had no desire to be chased.  

I consciously try to pastor as Jesus pastored: I don’t focus on numbers but disciples, investing in the few who can then invest in more while also intentionally pastoring those on the margins, those others might walk past.  

I started looking for others to personally invest in. 

I have gone to where the kids are rather than them expecting them to come to me or to church events. It has provided a much better outreach.

GOALS

I started giving myself goals – both personally and professionally every year.  It’s helped me to stay motivated and be a self-starter.  

GRACE

I admit I don’t have all the answers. I’ve come to a place where I know I’m not the smartest one in the room. I don’t have to know everything or be perfect. I’m giving myself more grace. 

Learning to live by grace.   

I started to practice resting in the grace of God. 

I choose to live in the grace of God. 

I began to choose forgiveness sooner. Following the loss of a loved one, it’s become easier to give and to give sooner because of understanding how fragile life is. 

HEART MATTERS

I started praying for God to break my heart in areas in which I wanted a breakthrough. 

INTEGRITY

Choosing to walk with integrity no matter the cost.   

HOLY SPIRIT

Rather than fight or get frustrated, I let the demands of life and ministry grow the fruit of the Spirit in my life. The result is that I am more dependable as a minister.  

HUMILITY

I have decided it is not weakness to ask for help. 

LEADERSHIP

I’ve made a conscious effort to discover my untapped ministry leadership potential and to lead as God has called me and enabled me. 

Intentionally empowering people by giving away power: just because you can do something doesn’t mean you should be the one to do it. 

Shifted my focus from “I lead the Ministry” to “We all buy into and lead what God is doing in this ministry.” 

LOVE 

Learning more and more how to love well from God’s heart and as a ministry to God.   

MARRIAGE AND MINISTRY

My wife became my sounding board for ideas and messages.

PASTORAL MINISTRY

No more leadership and church growth techniques; I focus on relational ministry, building relationship with God and others and letting my ministry flow there. 

I decided to focus more on connecting with people pastorally, rather than asking them to connect with me as an organizational leader. 

PEER RELATIONSHIPS

I choose to talk to peers in ministry more often each month (walking deeper with peers). 

Operating under a team concept rather than a lone-wolf concept. 

Opening my life up to community and deeper relationships, allowing myself to be affected and directly influenced by others rather than solely by my internal world.

I began building strong connections with other local ministers in my denomination.  

I decided to stay connected with local youth pastors in my area in each location of ministry.  

PERSONAL DISCIPLESHIP

I completed a two-year mentorship program. 

PRIORITIES and PERSONAL DISCIPLINE

I started saying no to requests, instead of always saying yes and burning myself out.  

I use my calendar to live out my priorities – my daily time with God, with my family, with my team members, free time, etc. 

I disciplined myself to leave my desk clean every time I leave my office for the day. 

PODCASTS 

I have started listening to podcasts by a preaching couple whose messages really feed me. 

I stopped listening to political talk radio all the time and instead started listening to podcasts that fed me.

PREACHING

I do not waiver from “hard” preaching. Youth can understand and they need the cold hard facts and the more I present it that way the better questions I get from them.  

READING

I have been reading more for fun and not just for my career.  

I chose to actually read books. I ask friends for recommendations and do research on what to read.

Reading and seeking outside resources beyond what I know. I do not have all the answers but as I spend time with others who have gone before me and take in wisdom from others it has challenged me and helped me grow in significant ways. 

I decided to read theology/classic Christian books along with fiction. 

I became a reader – solid books on theology and ministry.  

I started reading things what I did not agree with and stretched my perspective.  

Making an intentional effort to read more – particularly books for my own spiritual and leadership development. 

I got serious about building–and reading through–my personal library.   

RELATIONSHIPS

I started opening up to safe people about when I’m starting to feel depressed or anxious. I used to keep everything locked in tightly and I was a very broken person because of it. 

used to keep everything locked in tightly and I was a very broken person because of it. 

I set clearly defined relational boundaries.  

Learning what is means to love others and interact with them more authentically. 

I joined a men’s Bible study at my church.  

SPIRITUAL DISCIPLINE:  CONFESSION

I made a decision to remove all known idolatry from my life. 

I implemented biblical confession and repentance. I identify and confess the imperfect places

within me, asking for forgiveness, and for God’s help and healing. 

SPIRITUAL DISCIPLINE:  FASTING

I added full meal/full day fasting to my life. 

I have started fasting for clarity and guidance. 

Fasting each Wednesday in preparation of services.  

SPIRITUAL DISCIPLINE:  SABBATH

Incorporating a true Sabbath into my life that does not involve church/ministry agendas.  

Keeping a day of Rest, not Sunday.  

I protect my day off. My Sabbath is my Sabbath, not a day to catch up on ministry.

I’ve started implementing periods of intentional rest each week. 

Prioritizing and scheduling Sabbath rest.  

SPIRITUAL DISCIPLINE:  SOLITUDE

I added more contemplative activities to my spiritual disciplines. 

I began the spiritual discipline of resting in stillness as a way of developing a sense of identity in God’s presence even though I wasn’t “doing something.” 

I spend more intentional time with Jesus. This is ever growing but it has made a huge impact in my life and ministry and how I view life and ministry. 

SPIRITUAL DISCIPLINE:  WORD AND PRAYER

I committed to listening to a daily office and scripture before leadership or ministry study. 

I started making sure to read God’s Word faithfully everyday. 

I now utilize drive time for prayer and audio Bible.  

I make Word and Prayer THE priority of my life – first appointment every day. 

I began journaling as part of my prayer and devotional time. 

Became more intentional about keeping my Appointment with God.  

SPIRITUAL DISCIPLINE: WORSHP

I decided to start my 30-minute commute to work every morning with worship. 

SPIRITUAL DISCIPLINE:  WHOLE LIFE 

Be holistically open before God. 

STEWARDSHIP OF MY WELL BEING – PHYSICAL AND SPIRITUAL

I began working out and eating healthier. 

When I began my present ministry position, I stopped drinking. I was only drinking in moderation, but I stopped completely. I’ve lived more happily and refreshed than ever before.  

I have not only made it a point of understanding what it means to be healthy holistically I have actively started taking steps to pursue holistic health.  

I no longer try to fix emotional and physical problems with only spiritual solutions. Instead, I find ways to maintain health in all three areas. 

STRATEGIC PLANNING

Making strategic plans, yet always surrendering those lists and activities to the Holy Spirit.  

VIEW OF PEOPLE

I am no longer critical of others churches/ministries without knowing them intimately. 

Committing to see a spark of the Divine in humanity—a deep conviction that each person is valued as a creation of God.

WALK WITH GOD

Learning to rely on God’s timing to fulfill the ministry/pastoral call on my life.  

I decided to focus more on experiencing God rather than following human wisdom. 

WORK ETHIC

I began working hard – very hard. I’ve traded in apathy for commitment. I do now whatever it takes to provide for my wife and to lead my ministry.

WRITING

I began my writing career and began studying Biblical topics.  

WHAT PROFESSORS HAD TO SAY AFTER CLASS

In closing, seven wise individuals speak to learning after leaving formal education . . . 

“It’s what you learn after you know it all that counts.”  John Wooden

“The most effective learning of all, more than all other forms combined, is going through hardship with support, and evaluation.”  The Center for Creative Leadership

“The end of all learning is to know God, and out of that knowledge to love and imitate Him.” John Milton

“Other people may be there to help us, teach us, guide us along our path. But the lesson to be learned is always ours.”  Melody Beattie

“I make an absolute distinction between those who strive with all their might to learn and those who live without troubling themselves or thinking about it.”  Blaise Pascal

“Education is learning what you didn’t even know that you didn’t know.”  Daniel Boorstin

“A college education will never hurt anyone who is willing to learn something after graduating.” DAB

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NOTE: Journey Pastoral Coaching provides pastoral coaching to Millennial ministers.

Saddled with large student debt, just beginning to set up homes and start families, and serving in low paying first and second positions, Millennials are those who most desire but can least afford to pay for pastoral coaching.

So we offer it to them at NO COST: Our members do not PAY for coaching; they EARN it.

We are able to do so through the faithful and generous gifts of friends who want to see young leaders not only enter the ministry, but remain in the ministry. If you or your church would like to help Millennial ministers in 21 US states and 5 nations build strong for a lifetime in ministry, please click here to contact us by email or to support Journey monthly or with your one-time gift. Thank you.

We also invite you to click and subscribe to our twice-monthly blogs at journeypastoralcoaching.com

“In the early years when I was becoming a pastor, I needed a pastor.” 

 Eugene H. Peterson, The Pastor: A Memoir