U40 Influencers
INTRODUCTION TO THE SURVEY
Recently we asked U40ministers to name the individuals who have been the most positive influencers in their life. We asked them two questions:
- 1. “Who has had the most positive influence on your life? (Excluding wife or husband).
- 2. “In one or two sentences, how did this person so positively influence you?”
Journey offered the following list of influencers from which respondents could select. Respondents were permitted to select one to three influencers:
Children’s Ministry Leader
Children’s Pastor
Church Member
Colleague
Father
Friend
Grandfather
Grandmother
Mother
Other (Name the role/influencer)
Other Family Member
Public or Historical figure
Senior / Lead Pastor
Sibling
Stepfather
Stepmother
Sunday School Teacher
Teacher
Youth Ministry Leader
Youth Pastor
THE RESULTS
Respondents’ answers are offered below in four forms:
- First, how many respondents selected each influencer;
- Second, respondents’ reasons for selecting their most positive influencers;
- Third, the Top Five characteristics of influencers, as offered by respondents;
- Fourth, the reaction of individual Journey members to the results.
I. HOW MANY RESPONDENTS SELECTED EACH INFLUENCER
(As a percentage of total number of respondents)
- Father – 50% of respondents selected “Father.”
- Mother – 48%
- Youth Pastor – 30%
- Lead Pastor – 28%
- Other (Name the role): Pastoral Coach / Mentor – 25%
- Friend – 23%
- Teacher / Professor – 20%
- Grandfather – 15%
- Colleague – 10%
- Stepfather – 8%
- Sibling – 8%
- Grandmother – 8%
- Sibling – 5%
- Public or Historical Figure – 5%
- SS Teacher – 3%
- Other Family – 3%
- Mother-in-Law – 3%
- Father-in-Law – 3%
- Church Member – 3%
- Children’s Pastor – 3%
- Other (Name the role): Principal – 3%
II. RESPONDENTS’ REASONS FOR SELECTING INFLUENCERS:
We have included respondents’ comments if they chose to describe what these influencers did to have had such a positive effect on their lives.
In some cases, respondents chose to describe the positive effect of each individualinfluencer. These responses are listed first below in the section, “Individuals & Their Positive Influence Described.”
In other cases, respondents chose to describe the positive effect of their influencers as a group. These responses are listed below in the section, “Individual Influencers Described as a Group.”
In some cases, respondents chose not to describe the influence. These responses are in the first section.
INDIVIDUALS AND THEIR POSITIVE INFLUENCE DESCRIBED
Below are respondents’ answers, listing individuals and individual descriptions. Influencers are listed alphabetically, followed by the number of respondents who selected them, and then descriptions.
The Responses (In alphabetical order):
- Church member (1 Respondent):
He encourages me by exemplifying passionate love of Jesus and worships God exuberantly. He also encourages me to press on through my struggles and not to abandon my calling.
- Colleague (4 Respondents):
No description (3 Respondents)
See below “INDIVIDUAL INFLUENCERS DESCRIBED AS A GROUP” for additional mentions.
- Father (20 Respondents):
He taught me my values and how to be a real man. He still influences me today to be a better father.
He always prayed before making decisions.
He showed me what it meant to have deep and rich faith.
He always pushed me to be better and never settle in my relationship with God.
He spoke life over me, spent time with me, cheered me on, and led me to Jesus.
He is an example of generosity and selflessness in always putting the needs of others before his own.
He showed me how to provide for my family and how to lead.
He showed great patience as I learned and grew in my faith
He has always been a man of prayer and spiritual reality. He would have made a great pastor to a church. But he was always a great pastor to his family. Some of us refer to him as “man of God.”
He believes in me and he tells me why he believes in me.
He set an example for me by his own life.
His influence has to do with being an example through action. Specifically, seeing him change over my life to being more and more humble. Making mistakes but not allowing them to define him.
No description (5 Respondents)
See below “INDIVIDUAL INFLUENCERS DESCRIBED AS A GROUP” for additional mentions.
- Father-in-law (1 Respondent):
He showed grace, love, and truth to me.
- Friend (9 Respondents):
He intentionally discipled me and taught me to disciple others.
He sharpens me in my thinking and growth into the image of Christ.
He taught me about the Holy Spirit.
He showed me the simplest form of following Jesus and how God could use it.
No description (2 Respondents)
See below “INDIVIDUAL INFLUENCERS DESCRIBED AS A GROUP” for additional mentions.
- Grandfather (6 Respondents):
He showed me how to be a man of God and a man that studies His Word.
It was not so much what he said but rather who he was. His presence preceeded his person. He always enjoyed laughing and smiling and in some way that brought everyone in the room closer together.
He always viewed me as Precious and encouraged me to follow my dreams
He modeled and intentionally instilled patterns into all areas of my life while remaining fun and approachable.
He modeled and exemplified what it means to be faithfully love God, his wife, family, and church.
No description (1 Respondent)
- Grandmother (3 Respondents):
She taught me the meaning of sacrifice and encouraged my pursuit of God’s call when no one else did
No description (2 Respondents)
- Mother (19 Respondents):
She was the one who taught me how to do everything. I would be nothing without her.
She sacrificed and always provided love during a difficult childhood.
She always prayed for me.
She worked incredibly hard, and put her family’s happiness first.
She never stopped praying for me when I continuously ran from God and his calling on my life.
She always pushed me to get better and not be a deadbeat.
She had enduring hope for me to receiving healing. Her unwavering faith gave me hope I too would experience freedom.
She taught me God’s word every morning without fail for my whole life growing up.
She exemplified the life of Jesus in a real and tangible way.
She has supported me in all my endeavors, often self-sacrificing to help my chase after dreams and goals that I had for myself.
She showed me what it meant to have compassion and care for others.
She loved me through my mistakes. Never once did she doubt that I would do something great for God.
She sacrificed so much to give me a good life. Her Christlike sacrifice.
No description (2 Respondents)
See below “INDIVIDUAL INFLUENCERS DESCRIBED AS A GROUP” for additional mentions.
- Mother-in-law (1 Respondent):
She showed me what human, unconditional love was and that it was ok and necessary to establish good, healthy boundaries—I needed this to step into freedom from toxic, dysfunctional family relationships.
- Other – Pastoral Coach/Mentor (10 Respondents):
He asked me the questions I didn’t know I needed to be asking.
He shows me grace repeatedly, not only in words but in actions.
He helped me believe in myself when I wanted to doubt myself.
She always prayed for me.
He always believed in me.
No description (4 Respondents)
See below “INDIVIDUAL INFLUENCERS DESCRIBED AS A GROUP” for additional mentions.
- Other – Principal (1 Respondent):
No description (1 Respondent)
- Public or historical figure (2 Respondent):
He wrote about the reality of God’s world through life-changing stories.
See below “INDIVIDUAL INFLUENCERS DESCRIBED AS A GROUP” for additional mentions.
- Senior/Lead Pastor (11 Respondents):
He always set a Godly example for me.
He intentionally spent time with me and asked hard questions.
He challenged me to work towards excellence as mentioned in the Bible.
He showed me how to be a healthy leader in ministry and allowed me to flourish.
He encouraged me when I wondered if I had a future in ministry.
He taught and encouraged me in the baptism in the Holy Spirit. Confirmed and supported my calling.
No description (5 Respondents)
- Sibling (2 Respondents):
She supported, encouraged, believed in me, and was with me during one of the hardest seasons of life.
No description (1 Respondent)
See below “INDIVIDUAL INFLUENCERS DESCRIBED AS A GROUP” for additional mentions.
- Stepfather (3 Respondents):
He showed me how to be a man.
See below “INDIVIDUAL INFLUENCERS DESCRIBED AS A GROUP” for additional mentions.
- Sunday School Teacher (1 Respondent):
She not only taught me who God is and how to get excited about reading God’s Word, but also lived her walk in front of me as well.
- Teacher (8 Respondents):
He taught me to think theologically and showed me what following Jesus in the Spirit really meant.
He walked with me and lived a life I could model.
He gave me a passion for God’s Word.
He instilled a love for learning.
No description (2 Respondents)
See below “INDIVIDUAL INFLUENCERS DESCRIBED AS A GROUP” for additional mentions.
- Youth Pastor (12 Respondents):
He was the first adult that believed in me, really respected me and treated me like an adult. He set an example that I couldn’t help but follow.”
He showed me that callings are fun; he broke the stereotype. He put me in positions where I could be influenced by Christ!
He encouraged me and gave me opportunities to grow in my calling.
He saw something in me and drew it out by encouraging me to lead and entrusting me with responsibilities
He was willing to meet with me personally.
He was the one who reached out to me when I was away from the Lord and helped guide me back.
He always pushes me to get better.
No description (3 Respondents)
See below “INDIVIDUAL INFLUENCERS DESCRIBED AS A GROUP” for additional mentions.
INDIVIDUAL INFLUENCERS DESCRIBED AS A GROUP
- Respondent: Stepfather, Youth Pastor, Friend
They influenced me by being there during tough times. And caring for me
- Respondent: Mother, Father, Friend
They taught me to seek God above all else. They taught me about friendship.
- Respondent: Sibling, Other Family Member, Youth Pastor
They took time to show me that I was valued and seen by God and took time to pour into my life, especially in a time when things were chaotic.
- Respondent: Teacher, Friend
They were the only ones who reached out to me and wanted to be with me. Their Christ-like love attracted me to them as they embraced me.
- Respondent: Mother, Father, Colleague
They taught me what it means to live out my faith in a very practical way.
- Respondent: Mother, Stepfather, Campus Pastor / Pastoral Coach
They showed me how to walk with Jesus, taught me how to value people, and modeled for me how to blend a love for God and a love for people into pastoral ministry!
- Respondent: Mother, Teacher, Public or historical figure
They shared their journey with me, listened to me, supported who I am, and allowed me to find my own way by celebrating my unique gifts. They encouraged my creativity and broader thinking about my faith and life.
III. TOP FIVE CHARACTERISTICS OF INFLUENCERS
As the question above indicates, we did not list characteristics from which respondents could choose, but asked them to describe their influencers. In those answers from our respondents, . . .
- 38% wrote of influencers who are living demonstrations of what respondents want to be;
- 30% mentioned of those who teach them in word and in deed;
- 20% indicated those who give them the gift of time;
- 20% recalled those who encourage them;
- 20% cited those who believe in them.
IV. REACTION OF JOURNEY MEMBERS TO THE RESULTS
The JPC Cohort is a group of Journey members who have studied pastoral coaching together. We asked them to give their observations on our findings. Here’s what several had to say . . .
JPC Member #1:
Parents are twice as likely than other close influencers (which are all adults with significant investment) and friends (who teens value but whose influence doesn’t seem long lasting).
- 1. Dads – exemplify
- 2. Moms – nurture
- 3. Grandparents – support
- 4. Youth Pastors – value/connect
- 5. Teachers/coaches – impart wisdom
There are clear roles commonly felt by many that the key investors in a person’s life have as they reflect back as an adult. It is not articles or conferences or sermons that do the influencing, though they do play a part. It is the steady companionship of another living their life and sharing it with an individual – the closest companions life gives us – that make the strongest difference on the formation and influence of faith.
JPC Member #2:
It’s interesting how truly important both the Father and the Mother are to the child’s development and understanding of God. The Father answers tend to be about teaching responsibility, challenge of growth and dedication to integrating the relationship with Christ into the everyday. The Mother was an example of sacrifice and commitment, truly the glue of any developing Christian’s faith. (If the father is the structure, the mother is the glue that helps it hold together)
I was surprised to see the youth pastor and it hinged around belief in potential, calling out that potential, and being a patient traveler with the student as their potential manifested itself into reality.
JPC Member #3
I was impressed that so many of us young ministers look so strongly to our parents and grandparents as models and influencers. So much is made of generational differences. This respect for our elders was was great to see. We look to our mothers and fathers for different strengths and encouragements, but the fact of – and the desire – for their influence is evident.
I also noticed that so many of us talked about our influencers believing in us, seeing our strengths, and encouraging us to just be who God made us to be. Could it be that their positive influence in our lives helped us be open to God’s leading in our lives?
I was also happy to see how many listed Pastoral Coach even though it wasn’t offered as a choice. That says a lot about the value of pastoral coaching. I wonder how many people who took this survey would have chosen their pastoral coach if it had been listed and if they have one. A lot don’t.
JPC Member #4
I really was shocked at the amount of youth pastors who had influence on people instead of children’s pastors and Sunday school teachers. Even the youth leaders had little to no influence on people only the head leader. It confuses me to think that the position that is slowly dwindling away in our churches had/has such a great effect on ministers in our life.
V. INFLUENCE: THE PEBBLE IN THE POND
As I read through the submissions of our respondents, I was struck by the richness of their comments, painting in just a few words simple portraits of people I know and treasure in my own life: the living examples; the blend of tenderness and toughness; those who have sacrificed for me (and still do); those who have pushed, challenged, comforted, and encouraged me; those who have prayed for me and with me; those who have believed in me and told me so; those who love me.
Did you see those people in your life, too? The dads who were examples of Jesus? The moms who sacrificed for you? The teachers who patiently instructed you, not just with words of the mind, but of the heart? The sibling you fought with so hard because you were knit together so deeply (and still are)? The grandparents who enveloped you in love and rained unbounded joy over you – they loved you just as you are? The pastors who so faithfully walked with you and discipled you? The friends who, to quote another, sang your life song over you even when you had forgotten how to sing? Do you see the encouragers, the believers, the comforters . . . the solid gold but living influencers whom God has brought into your life?
The Top Five mentioned qualities of influencers present us keys and an opportunity: could it be that even now we are standing near someone in our family or ministry who is not only open to, but looking for one of these gifts in the person of you? Could it be that our influence for Jesus can be multiplied and maximized by acting on these five keys as we take the opportunity to . . .
- Demonstrate Jesus Christ in our being and our doing;
- Teach through our living (and so, earn the right to be heard in our teaching);
- Give the simple gift of time to those under us;
- Encourage others at all times – at all times;
- Believe in someone in all things.
Influence is a delivery of trust. It is delivering personally, faithfully, consistently and clearly; delivering in word, deed, attitude, and lifestyle; delivering in example, service, friendship, and partnership.
May God help us to take these keys and the opportunities He presents us to deliver trust to others. To invest influence. For the glory of God, the good of His Church, and the salvation of those yet separated from Him.
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Special Note: We invite you to consider purchasing our recently released book, “When the Call Comes,” written to help ministers as they walk with those who mourn. Unexpected, or after an extended illness, there is no pastoral responsibility, or privilege, that compares with shepherding people as they say their final goodbyes and mourn their loss. “When the Call Comes” helps pastors serve those who mourn, from the initial call to the end of the funeral. We address issues like:
“What is the purpose of a funeral and how do I conduct one?”
“What is my role as a pastor, walking families through grief?”
“What should I say when I meet with the family?”
“What do I do in the case of a difficult death: suicide, violence, or infant death?”
“Why do we conduct funeral and graveside services?”
“What do I do when ‘the call’ comes?”
You can read the preface to the book by clicking on this link or you can purchase your copy by clicking here.
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NOTE: Journey Pastoral Coaching exists to provide pastoral coaching to Millennial ministers.
Saddled with large student debt, just beginning to set up homes and start families, and serving in low paying first and second positions, Millennials are those who most desire but can least afford to pay for pastoral coaching.
So we offer it to them at NO COST: Our members do not PAY for coaching; they EARN it by investing in each other.
We are able to do so thanks to the faithful and generous support of individuals and churches like yours who want to see young leaders not only enter the ministry, but remain in the ministry. If you or your church would like to help Millennial ministers in 20 US states and 5 nations build strong for a lifetime in ministry, please click here to contact us by email or to support Journey monthly or with your one-time gift. Thank you.
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“In the early years when I was becoming a pastor, I needed a pastor.”
Eugene H. Peterson, The Pastor: A Memoir
