A Plea to Hurting Pastors
“Many pastors confide to me that they are merely surviving. They feel incompetent to do what they are expected to do week after week. . . For many, the thought of thriving in ministry is a distant, unachievable dream. And yet, I know the Lord has called every pastor and ministry leader to experience the joy of thriving in ministry!” Jimmy Dodd, Survive or Thrive
Our pastoral coaching ministry for young ministers receives inquiries every week:
Requests for consulting on launching coaching ministries;
Requests for consulting on renewing existing coaching ministries;
Requests for training in pastoral coaching;
Requests for one-time coaching calls;
Resource questions;
Requests to join our coaching ministry.
Looking at the last request, what reasons do young ministers give for wanting to join Journey?
- The opportunity to walk with a pastoral coach (being a “no financial cost” ministry doesn’t hurt);
- The opportunity to walk with peers in a mutual investment ministry;
- They have a friend in ministry who is a Journey member;
- They have taken all the “hits” they can take – they’re hurting and don’t know how to continue;
- They have no one to talk to – they are lonely, isolated, and don’t know what to do.
The last two reasons can be blended into one thought: these young ministers are at a standstill in their life in ministry; they don’t know how to move forward in a healthy way.
SHARING THE JOURNEY OF MINISTRY
Since our beginning, our mission has not changed: Journey exists to help young ministers build strong for a lifetime of healthy and effective ministry. We seek to fulfill our mission by being a mutual investment ministry: our members invest in one other. Following the model and ministry of Jesus, and the entire New Testament, we share the journey of ministry – listening, encouraging, challenging, supporting, strengthening, whatever each of us can do to serve. The benefit is to the one who receives. But equally important, the benefit is to him who gives: he is walking in the way of Jesus.
Seven years of Journey ministry have proven Luke 6.38 to be true:
“Give and it shall be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”
Those members who have invested most in other Journey members have grown the most from the ministry of Journey – they prove Luke 6.38. This is why mutual investment is a required commitment of all Journey members. It’s how they “pay” for coaching. Our members have deep currents of encouragement, challenge, wisdom, and support to give each other. As they pour into one another, the recipient is blessed, and the giver is Luke 6.38 blessed. We see it all the time. I like to call it Journey’s “secret weapon” in helping young ministers build strong for a lifetime of healthy and effective ministry.
UN MYSTERE ET UNE DOULEUR
I’ve explained a little of our philosophy and practice at Journey so that I might share “un mystère et “une douleur” (a mystery and deep pain).
The teaching of Scripture on the following subjects is clear. And each is life-giving as we obey. While these truths are for all believers, they have special significance and priority for those who lead the people of God:
The command to live in community with other believers;
The vital strength of living in authentic community;
The necessity of shared journey in the ministry of the Gospel;
Our need for mutual encouragement and accountability;
The wealth of ministry God makes available to us through others;
The responsibility of each believer to invest ministry in other believers;
On earth, Jesus’ ministry model was mentoring and shared ministry community.
Even a casual reading of the New Testament will reveal these truths – From Matthew to The Revelation, these truths virtually jump off the pages.
As I wrote earlier, some young ministers request membership in Journey when they are at a standstill. They are hurt or confused. Or both. They’re alone. And worse, they feel isolated.
We respond by sharing Journey’s mutual investment ministry approach with them. As a result, some “come home” to authentic community they’ve always hoped for but never experienced (no, not perfect community, but authentic community; we are still imperfect people!). These ministers have kept our membership roll over-filled for the past seven years since our beginning.
Others look over our approach and walk away – some for good reason. But others walk away for reasons I do not understand, especially in light of the New Testament. They don’t know what to do to find healing and develop a healthy life in ministry. They don’t know how to escape their blinding isolation and soul-crushing loneliness. They don’t know how to navigate the moment at hand and build for a lifetime of healthy and effective ministry.
They don’t know what to do.
It would seem they only know what not to do:
- experience authentic community;
- share the journey of ministry with peers;
- experience mutual encouragement and accountability;
- share and receive wisdom;
- experience mutual investment;
- do life and ministry the way Jesus did life and ministry.
Now “le mystère et la douleur ” :
The mystery: These young ministers, broken, hurting, alone, who don’t know what will work, think they know with certainty what won’t work: the way Jesus did ministry and taught ministry. They don’t know what to do, but they are sure these things are not true and life-giving. Frankly, this is a mystery to me: they don’t know what to do, but they “know” not to do what the Bible instructs us to do.
The douleur: Statistics say these young ministers will continue to hurt and be broken until they burn out or drop out. Not just out of the ministry, but far too often out of the church, and sometimes even out of the faith. Just a few years ago, they were flaming ministry rockets we were told to salute and follow. Today, they are wounded and wandering, blaming God, the church, and other ministers for not “being there.” Full disclosure: Coaches like me and coaching communities like ours were available to them. In many cases, we even talked with them, but they thought community a burden, preferring to walk alone.
I have walked with many broken ministers. Broken in the ministry, some of them are now former ministers. Some of these are angry and bitter, but most are wounded and wondering why things couldn’t have been different.
In notes, calls, and in person, many former ministers of my generation continue to tell me the same thing:
“Thank you so much for what you’re doing, for helping these young ministers and investing in them. If only I had had a ministry like yours in my life, maybe I would have made it.”
“Young minister at a standstill, hurting and alone. Young minister burned out and dropped out. RIP.”
This epitaph of far too many wonderful but wounded ministers does not have to be yours. There are ministers and ministries out there who will help you. So, please, don’t let pride or fear keep you from reaching out and then entering in. And don’t let what you think you know keep you from acting on what you do know: the model and teaching of Jesus.
In his book, As Iron Sharpens Iron, Howard Hendricks writes:
“The value of nurturing derives from the value of relationships. Show me a man’s closest companions and I can make a fairly accurate guess as to what sort of man he is, as well as what sort of man he is likely to become.”
If our closest companions are no one, we will become no one. And history says we will likely accomplish nothing for The One.
FINAL THOUGHT
We’ll close with this thought from one of history’s most influential ministers, Billy Graham, words he shared as he neared the end of his life on earth:
“Although I have much to be grateful for as I look back over my life, I also have many regrets. I have failed many times, and I would do many things differently . . . I would give more attention to fellowship with other Christians, who could teach me and encourage me (and even rebuke me when necessary).”
Young minister, you don’t have to walk alone.
_______________
Saddled with large student debt, just beginning to set up homes and start families, and serving in low paying first and second positions, Millennials are those who most desire but can least afford to pay for pastoral coaching.
We are able to do so thanks to the faithful and generous support of individuals and churches like yours who want to see young leaders not only enter the ministry, but remain in the ministry.
Now, more than ever, we need your help.
If you or your church would like to help Millennial ministers across the US and overseas build strong for a lifetime in ministry, please click here to support Journey monthly or with your one-time gift. Thank you.
We also invite you to click and subscribe to our twice-monthly blogs at journeypastoralcoaching.com
