The life-giving benefits of dynamic peer mentorship for ministers are incredible. By divine design, they are equal to our inborn need for mentorship. This is especially true for young ministers. In his book, “Serious Times,” pastor and author James Emery White describes it this way:

“One of the more unsettling revelations to most Christ followers, particularly in light of our fierce             individualism, is how many of the marks of a Christian involve other people . . . Following Him is tied to the “one anothers.”

One of the virtues of Millennials is their innate sense of doing life with others: they are built for peer mentorship. Where most Boomer generation ministers see themselves as independently strong “Clint Eastwood types,” Millennials have embraced the more biblical value of sharing the journey, of doing life and ministry with others. In doing so, they have tapped into one of the mother lodes of building strong for a lifetime of healthy and effective ministry.

In our most recent blog post we began this two-part look at the power of peer mentorship. In that post we uncovered five benefits available to every person who dares to embark upon the God-ordained adventure of peer mentorship:

 

1. God built you and me for peer mentorship; peer mentorship means health.
2. Needed Mutual encouragement and correction are ours.
3. We kill the #1 killer of ministers: isolation.
4. Ministers share a unique life; therefore, they can uniquely share their life.
5. Godly Peer-mentors draw us deeper into Jesus.

 

Today we take a second look at the power of peer-mentorship, adding five more reasons why you should build godly and positive peer mentors into your personal and ministry life.

 

6. Peer-mentors help us maintain personal priorities & ministry focus.

“It is within relational networks that people are transformed through mutual encouragement

and correction, learn to respond to each other’s needs instead of being self-focused.”

Eddie Gibbs, in his book, The Journey of Ministry

In the process of seeking a peer-mentor who can help me, I have a startling revelation: I recognize my responsibility to first be a peer-mentor, a friend, a brother or sister who shares someone else’s journey. Sharing the journey does not begin with me, but with we (See Romans 12 and I Corinthians 12 to begin with). And the paradox is this: as I seek the wellbeing and blessing of my friend, my own life is made whole in the overflow: my own life is enriched beyond my wildest dreams.

For more than 30 years now, a copy of “The Prayer of St. Francis” has hung on the walls of my studies in three nations and four US states. I have kept it near my desk to call to the day-in, day-out personal priorities and ministry focus of Jesus. The second half of that prayer is breathtaking in its poignant call to serve my brother or sister, to (if you will) coach them:

“O Divine Master, grant that I may not so much seek

            To be consoled as to console,

            To be understood as to understand,

            To be loved as to love;

            For it is in giving that we receive;

            It is in pardoning that we are pardoned;

            It is in dying to self that we are born to eternal life.”

We come to peer mentorship, and to all relationships, not for what we can get, but for what we can give.

And lest we say we have nothing to give because we are the younger, the imperfect, or the broken, let us be reminded of the promise of God: “My power is made perfect in weakness” (II Corinthians 12.9) God’s grace, wisdom, peace, and power come to us not through men mighty or women wise in themselves, but through the weak and humble who choose to dynamically rely on Him at all times – in both the receiving and the giving of these virtues. Vine. Branch. Fruit. John 15.

Even Jesus received strength, encouragement, focus and much more from people just like you and me – Peter, James, John and His other friends, the one we call His disciples.

Shared journeys mean living life focused and by our priorities.

 

7. Answered prayer: as we agree together in prayer, miracles are unleashed.

“Where is unusual power in united prayer? God has planned for His people to join together in prayer, not only for Christian fellowship, spiritual nurture, and growth, but also for accomplishing His divine purposes and reaching His chosen goals.” Wesley Duewel, in Mighty Prevailing Prayer

Don’t you love it when people ask you, “How are you?” or “What can I pray about with you?” The question itself is faith building, comforting, encouraging, and even challenging, isn’t it? And then, to hear the person say to us, “I am praying for you,” – and to know they mean it – God enters those moments with divine strength, peace, and power.

What would happen if, by twos, by twelves, by twenties, and by even larger numbers, peers stopped each other in life’s busyness, grabbed one other by the shoulders, looked one another in the eye and asked, “No, really, how are you? What can I pray about with you?”

Just a moment ago as I was working on this blog, someone texted me to say exactly that to me: “How are you? How is your health?” The instrument was human, but the voice was divine. I’m more confident of my healing than I have ever been because this messenger from God took the time to connect and ask this one simple question.

Shared journeys mean shared miracles.

 

8. Wisdom. Godly counsel. Challenge. A new perspective.

“I have learned that much of my spiritual progress does not come directly from God, but through my ability to humble myself and hear Him speak through imperfect people. In fact, I have discovered that it pleases Him to hide His manifold wisdom in a variety of people and denominational perspectives. I know that the more I humble myself to others, the broader my understanding of God has actually become.” Francis Frangipane

In 2016, many members of Journey Pastoral Coaching spoke of this very benefit, telling us that their walk with Christ has been made richer, even transformed, by their shared journeys with peers in ministry. For some their shared journeys are with peers in the usual denominational and geographic circles. For others, that shared journey is with people outside their usual circles of denomination, religious tradition, race, etc. It has been a great joy to hear of their life giving experiences and the growth in Jesus that has resulted from these relationships.

Be it the phone call from time to time, the occasional office visit, or the regular sit-down-for-coffee relationships, how precious and life giving is the opportunity to “break bread” together in the presence of the One who directs our individual and shared journeys.

 

9. Truth. Confrontation. Correction.

“Though I know intellectually how vulnerable I am to pride and power, I am the last one to know when  I succumb to their seduction. That’s why spiritual Lone Rangers are so dangerous – and why we must depend on trusted brothers and sisters who love us enough to tell us the truth.” Charles Colson

I don’t know about you, but I don’t really enjoy being corrected – being corrected by others is not my spiritual gift. But thank God it is the spiritual gift of significant people in my life. Used by God, they have the gift of getting past my insecurities, ego and just general “stuff,” and give me the dose of truth I need.

And I know that . . .

. . . because they love me,

. . . because I love and need them,

. . . because they are God’s gifts to me, and,

. . . because we are committed to and are actually on a shared journey.

The writer of Proverbs put it this way: “Faithful are the wounds of a friend” (Proverbs 27.6).

I know that their correction is God’s blend of the truth in love that I need in my life and in ministry.

 

10. Peer-mentors change the math of ministry

In one study that took place over a 20-year time frame, researchers found the following:

100% of ministers surveyed had a friend or acquaintance who had left the ministry due to burnout,relational conflict or moral failure;

Only 23% of those surveyed said they felt content with who they are as a person;

71% of those participating said they were burned out or battle depression;

57% said they would quit if they had a better place to go. Even to a secular job.

And, as a ministry to Millennial ministers, a particularly troubling statistical I often reference: 5 of 10 ministers will quit the ministry within 5 years of beginning in ministry. At Journey, we refer to it as the 5-10-5 Rule.

Any equation that equals 5 in 10 new ministers leaving the ministry within the first five years is unacceptable math. Everyone who loves God and His church should not only agree that it is unacceptable, but should do everything in his or her power to change the equation.

There is no magic wand or formula for changing the math of ministry life.

The only “wands” and “formulas” God has given us revolve largely around the word, “relationship”: a real and rich relationship with Jesus Christ and with significant others on the journey of life and ministry. Peer-mentors offer us the “magic” of relationship, the “magic” that was built into us at our creation by God, a “magic” that will live on forever, yes, even in the life to come.

Journeying together equals a solved equation every time.

 

FINAL THOUGHT

While serving as Campus Pastor at the national Bible College of the Assemblies of God, our campus community was blessed of God not only with a multi-year season of His blessing and favor, but with the life changing relationships, divine and human, that always accompany such moves of God. Each one sparked the other: the moving God’s Spirit provoked. I can’t tell you how many times an individual student or group of students told me, “We have to find a way to keep these connections between us when we’re out there in ministry. We can’t let it die. I know that I am definitely going to need it in MY life!”

Need. It. Life. Exactly.

Peer mentors are a gift from God, a key connection to life itself.

 

Journey Pastoral Coaching provides pastoral coaching to Millennial ministers.

Saddled with large student debt, just beginning to set up homes and start families, and serving in low paying first and second positions, Millennials are those who most desire but can least afford to pay for pastoral coaching.

So we offer it to them at no cost.

We are able to do so through the faithful and generous gifts of friends who want to see young leaders not only enter the ministry, but remain in the ministry. If you or your church would like to help Millennial ministers in 21 US states and 5 nations build strong for a lifetime in ministry, please click here to contact us by email or click on the link to support Journey through PayPal.

Thank you.