Burnout – Part Two
In Part One of this two-part look at burnout in the ministry, we looked at two subjects:
· the signs of burnout and
· the causes of burnout.
You can read that article here.
In this follow-up, we will consider
· the actions we can take to avoid burnout, and
· how to deal with it if it has found its way into our life.
QUESTION: How can we avoid the causes of burnout?
We must take both offensive and defensive measures, actions that lead to and protect our health.
Offensive or health-producing actions first. The way to help you avoid drowning is to first teach you how to swim. The most important lesson is not what to do when you are drowning, but how to be a strong swimmer, and so, avoid most drowning situations. Until someone is a swimmer, there is little he or she can do to avoid drowning when in deep waters. When we teach someone how to swim, we are teaching him or her the most effective actions the can take to avoid drowning. So it is with burnout.
OFFENSIVE ACTIONS
Develop focus. Focus on building your life and ministry according to the manufacturer’s handbook (The Bible). There are four proactive actions to incorporate into your soul life.
1. Focus more on what God is doing than what you are doing.
Live to fulfill your Jeremiah 1.5 creation and calling: “Before I formed you in your mother’s womb, I knew you, placed my hand on you, and appointed you to peoples.” When our focus is on the source of life, and His design and will for our life, our lives and ministries set in their proper perspective: our hope is not in ourselves or our situation, but in Him
Serve the Audience of One, not people. If we serve our ministries or people, we set ourselves up for disappointment and discouragement: there is no way we can please all the people all the time. But as we live to serve and please the Author, Producer, and Director of our life we live in His contentment.
Seek to be an expression of God’s creativity (in your discipleship, ministry, relationships, and yes, hobbies). An expression of the Creator’s work in your life will naturally give birth to creativity through your life. This is especially true for and necessary in the life of a minister. It is always life-giving.
2. Focus more on being than doing.
Jeremiah 1.5 again: focus first on being the person God designed and created you to be. Then, from this heartbeat of being His creation, do what all creation does: draw your life from Him. Like the branch that abides in the vine, focus on settling deep in the vine, allowing its life to flow into you and through you. You will then naturally produce fruit that is pleasing to God and life-giving to others. No branch that abides in the vine knows burnout.
Yes, we are to do, but only as an outflow of being. Without being narcissistic, we should do in life what we are built to do and not try to force ourselves into what God did not form us to do. As a man, God did not form me to give birth to babies. It’s not only ok to live in this limit, it’s life-giving to my soul as I accept this truth and revel in it.
As Jeremiah 1.5 says, God has appointed each of us because His hand is on us, His hand is on us because He knows us, He knows us because He designed and formed each of us. Let the potter who designed each of us define our ministries – according to our being, who He formed us to be, and so formed us to do. As we do, we grow according to our nature. The risk of burnout is reduced.
3. Focus on developing strong spiritual practices
Our most important ministry is not to people, but to and from God in Word, worship, and prayer. Let me highlight solitude and silence. We need to take time every day to go into the Holy of Holies to gaze upon the beauty of God, know Him as He is, and be transformed, healed, refreshed, by Him.
If we’re honest, ministry culture no longer emphasizes spiritual disciplines or drawing away with God as Job One of the minister. Think of the many ministry conferences where speakers spend days teaching how to do ministry, now and then interjecting, “Of course, remember to pray.” This PS approach to prayer tells everyone, young ministers especially, that Word, prayer, meditation, reflection, fasting, are all PSs to their real ministry – programming, CEOing, and leading others.
But remember, branch of Jesus: no abiding, no fruit that lasts. And, when we do not soul-abide in Jesus, our adversary – burnout – prowls around like a roaring lion, waiting to devour you. So say the heartbreaking statistics. Prayer and Word cannot be Post-Script. They must be Pure-Script (Acts 6) if we want to proactively build strength and prevent burnout.
Daily, we must follow Jesus in drawing away from the world, taking out God’s Word, reading it and meditating on it in silence. After meditating on the Word of God, then move into reflecting on the God of the Word. Learn the way of solitude and silence. Learn the way that not only prevents burnout, but helps us abide in the Vine of Abundant Life.
4. Focus on receiving consistent mentorship and pastoral care.
Every pastor needs a pastor. In the same way a doctor needs a doctor of his own, every pastor needs a pastor. Someone in ministry at least 10-15 years more than you. This is how Jesus formed the Twelve. In fact, after His ministry on the Cross, this aspect of mentorship and pastoral care, was Jesus’ primary ministry. He talked to thousands, but He walked with twelve. To reach a world of millions – and generations of billions to come – Jesus did not give Himself or the Twelve to preaching to crowds, but to walking under His mentorship and then mentoring others.
The Center for Creative Leadership writes: “The most effective learning of all, more than all other forms combined, is going through hardship with support, and evaluation.”
After a strong spiritual life (and as a part of a strong spiritual life), the single most effective step we can take for minister health and longevity (and so, avoid burnout) is walking with a pastor-mentor.
5. Focus on peer-mentors and peer small groups.
Not only did Jesus walk with the Twelve, but He required them to walk together in mutual accountability and encouragement.
In their outstanding book, Spiritual Mentoring, Keith R. Anderson and Randy D. Reece write: “Jesus not only spent time instructing, training and informing; he spent much time forming a community.”
Not only during Jesus’ time on earth, but, and especially for, the time after He left the earth. After Jesus ascended, the Apostles stayed and walked together in Jerusalem. They walked with Barnabas whom they sent to Antioch. Barnabas’ first act as pastor was to find Paul to work and walk with him. To the last page of his writings in the New Testament, Paul is emphasizing his ongoing walk with others – Timothy, Titus, Silas, Epaphroditus, John Mark, and others.
DEFENSIVE ACTIONS
Even the best of swimmers can face dangerous situations where drowning is possible. Just so, even the strongest in faith among us can find themselves at risk of burnout. What can we do to prevent ourselves from going over to “the dark side?”
1. Get an objective point of view on your stressors and how well you’re handling them.
I’ve already mentioned the resource, Preventing Ministry Failure by Wilson and Hoffman. Its Life Stress Inventory is a very helpful tool in measuring your stress level and assessing your risk of burnout and even breakdown. The problem with stress is we think we are managing it. And we may be, but only like managing to steer a car racing out of control – and without brakes: you’ve haven’t wrecked the car. But for how long? This inventory makes the important point that we can handle stress in the short-term, but the breakdown can self-delay up to two years. Take the survey. Then take the results to a mentor for a concrete conversation, anticipating changes or at least adjustments.
2. Ask your spouse or a close friend who will be honest with you.
“Ask them what?” For a start, ask them these three questions:
· Am I too busy? Corollary: do you and I get enough time together? Do we talk anything but ministry?
· Do I seem stressed to you?
· Do you think I am handling my stressors in a healthy way?
If their answers are yes, yes, and no, then, ask them these questions:
· Would you take the Stress Inventory with me?
· Would you keep me accountable on talking with a mentor or counselor about my stress, cutting where needed, delegating where possible, learning to handle stressors in healthy ways?
3. Talk with a mentor – someone in the ministry at least 15 years longer than you.
Be open and honest about your life in ministry and about how you are handling it. Many ministers are adept at wearing masks, masks that hide our internal processing and soul health (peace, joy, contentment, quietness of heart and mind). We are professionals at keeping our masks in place, not realizing that masks are great fire pits: they don’t put out the fires that cause burnout, they give them a place to burn. Learn to walk honestly and openly with a mentor, not just to escape burnout but as an ongoing part of a healthy life in ministry. In other words, if you don’t have one, get one. You may be a man or woman of God, but there is no big red “S” on your chest. Get a mentor. Now.
4. Walk with peer mentors (plural) – as a group if possible.
One of the aspects of our ministry, Journey Pastoral Coaching, for which I am most thankful, is the natural relationships that have developed between members. We have built in every avenue possible for members to walk with peers in ministry. To walk alone in Journey you have to try to do so, working to avoid others and the systems we have put in place to bring people into life-giving relationships.
Many of our members say they have found their closest friends in ministry here in Journey. They talk with each other on a regular basis, meet up when possible (given that we are scattered across the country), and connect on our private media platform. Every minister – extrovert or introvert – needs these relationships. God built this need into our DNA. To deny it or avoid it means burnout and death. To address means surviving and thriving. Walking with peers will spark life in you as they pull you into Jesus and into meaningful human relationships.
5. Resource Yourself.
There are many resources available to help you assess your risk of burnout. I’ve already mentioned one. Make it a habit to “read to your need”: continually resource yourself on stress-management, burnout, and most importantly, developing spiritual disciplines that put you in position for soul health. Be sure to talk about what you are learning with a mentor, peers, or even a counseling professional to get the help you need to realign your life and ministry in healthy and life-giving rhythms.
QUESTION: What would you say to a person today who is burned out and on the verge of leaving the ministry altogether?
1. Put down your pride, pain, or insecurity and reach out for help.
Studies consistently reveal most ministers have felt the fire of burnout – on the edges or in the depths of our soul. all of us know someone in ministry who burned out and left. Therefore, if the problem is so pervasive, why do we treat it like some sin or social disease and ourselves like we are pariahs to be excluded from the camp? Talk to someone. Tell them what you are experiencing. Odds are, they understand all too well. What qualifies me to talk burnout is my own experience with handling fire.
2. Be honest with yourself.
Admit your pain. Fight numbness with everything you have. If you don’t, it will strangle your soul. You need to feel the pain when stress overwhelms you – the grief, anger, disappointment – so you will do something about it rather than bury it.
And be sure to acknowledge your “successes” in two important ways. First, and most importantly, do what the old hymn of the church counsels: number and name the blessings of God in your life – celebrate them throughout each day. Second, identify the people who say you minister Jesus to their lives. Just as you should let yourself feel pain, let yourself feel these blessings and joys as well.
3. Talk to a mentor and make a commitment to walk with them over time.
Commit to walk with him or her now in emergency phase, in healing and restoration phase, and finally, in health stage. Don’t see a mentor as an ER professional, one to see only when you are in crisis. See him or her as a life professional, one who can help you walk in health. Timothy had one: Paul. Paul had one: Barnabas. Barnabas had twelve: The Twelve Apostles. The Twelve Apostles had one: Jesus. One of the things I do as a pastoral coach is look for signs of burnout and help our members not only deal with them when they appear, but recognize the signs before they appear. Even more important, I work hard to see them walk in health, avoiding the path that leads to burnout.
4. Talk to a denominational leader.
See if there is a way to get help in two areas: personal counseling and covering the ministries you lead so you can give yourself the freedom to do what you need to do to take care of yourself. This second simple step can help remove guilt as you get the help you need.
5. Sabbatical.
Take a sabbatical. An extra day off this week is delusional. An extra week off is a band-aid on a cancer. You need a sabbatical. No less than three months. I’ve written about taking a sabbatical – the what, why, and how of it. You can read that article here. Worried about finances to pay for it and the well-being of your church while you’re gone? There are groups like the Lilly Foundation who can even potentially help make it happen financially for you and for your church.
FINAL WORD
Studies of Evangelical and Reformed pastors indicate the following (Source: Fuller Institute of Church Growth Institute studies):
· 75% of pastors report being “extremely stressed” or “highly stressed”
· 90% feel fatigued and worn out every week
· 91% have experienced some form of burnout in ministry
Some studies even find that as high as 80% will not be in ministry ten years from today. A major factor in this percentage is burnout.
Is the issue lack of faith? Many in my Pentecostal-Charismatic circles say yes.
Is the problem the people we pastor? The match that strikes the flame possibly, but not the problem.
Is the concern character weakness? Possibly, but certainly not in every case, not even in most cases.
The issue, the problem, the concern is the soul:
· Not being aware of or honest about our stress, stressors, and how we’re handling them.
· Not fighting for the health of our souls as if our lives depend on it;
· Not fighting for the healing of our souls when we find them unhealthy;
· Not examining our souls as described in my first article;
· Not adopting all five foci addressed in this article;
Again, there is no big red “S” on your chest, minister of the Gospel. And even if you think there is, realize that stress is the kryptonite of ministry life, revealing the strength and weakness of our souls. Get the help you need. Let’s do all we can to kill the killer of burnout.
Saddled with large student debt, just beginning to set up homes and start families, and serving in low paying first and second positions, Millennials are those who most desire but can least afford to pay for pastoral coaching.
We are able to do so thanks to the faithful and generous support of individuals and churches like yours who want to see young leaders not only enter the ministry, but remain in the ministry.
Now, more than ever, we need your help.
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